You can read these texts in order or come back to them when a situation in love raises a question for you. A first reading lets you get to know the approach; looking things up by topic helps you find a description without going through everything again.
A path to understanding the bond
Start with the example that follows. After that, the reading moves through three parts: it goes from what each person brings to the relationship toward what they can build together.
In Who we are when we love, the invitation is to recognize the history you bring to love and to get to know your partner. That is where you will find the two inventories, the profiles of the Sun, the Moon, Mercury, and the Ascendant, and the expressions of the emotional world.
In What is born in the meeting, those views are brought into relation. It explores affinity, sign combinations, interest in the other person’s concerns, and what the contacts between the two charts awaken.
In Love in everyday life, the reading reaches rhythms, interests, decisions, and shared projects. There you return to the question that runs through the whole journey: how do you want to live the love that unites you?
If a description raises a question about your relationship, stop there. You can talk about something you have recognized before finishing a topic. If you are not in a relationship right now, the questions about your history and your expectations can also help you think about the bond you want.
A consultation based on what is happening to you
- I want to understand what expectations and histories we bring to love. Go to the inventories and learned patterns.
- I want to know each person’s descriptions before comparing us. See the profiles of the Sun, the Moon, Mercury, and the Ascendant.
- We love each other, but we express affection or anger in different ways. Look at the emotional expressions this system associates with the planets in the signs.
- I want to understand what draws us together and what we find hard to share. Start with the initial criteria for affinity; then go on to the sign combinations, the Sun and the Ascendant in the houses, and planetary relationships.
- We argue about going out, resting, or doing things together. See rhythms and mobility.
- We are not interested in the same plans or settings. Look at motivations and interests.
- We find it hard to decide, one of us always leads, or someone gives in too much. See the place each person takes in the group and in the couple.
- I want to think about the love we are building. Go to shared projects and the love you build together.
Bringing the views together
You may greatly enjoy intimacy with your partner and, at the same time, have trouble planning a weekend together. Those experiences can coexist: affection, activity rhythms, and interests raise different questions. As you move from one topic to another, hold on to what you have recognized in each.
The question that brings the reading together is this: what brings us closer, and what do we need to agree on? From there you will be able to tell the moments you both want to care for apart from the differences that need attention. Listen, too, to how your partner experiences it; the description of the relationship is completed by both experiences.
The data and the words you will find
To use the astrological sections, keep both people’s birth charts and birth data at hand. Identify the position the entry refers to: a description of the Sun cannot be swapped for one of the Moon or the Ascendant. If you do not know a piece of data, leave that lookup for later rather than attributing to someone a position you do not know.
The charts provide the data for the comparison; your experience and your partner’s let you see how you live the bond. That is why, alongside the reading, I offer you questions about behaviors, needs, and agreements. Hold on, too, to what you discover about enjoyment: what brings you closer, where you feel at ease, and what you would like to share more.
In the texts on the Sun and the Ascendant in the houses and on planetary relationships, you will find the letters A and B. Each heading indicates whose point is being looked at. Read those letters carefully: what is described in one direction should not be assumed in the other. Behind A and B are two real people, with histories and ways of loving that are still present.
In the sign combinations, each pair of signs appears only once: Aries–Taurus also covers the lookup for Taurus–Aries. You will also find a table of equivalent terms and a short glossary, with references to the topics where each term is explained.